In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Compassionate.
Finally, today I get to write something on this long-abandoned blog. It was first created around ten years ago (obviously I was really dedicated on "decorating" and making it as fancy as possible), but three years after, things happened and I did not feel like writing anymore. Or let's just be honest, I was just that lazy. hahaha.
Fast forward, a decade has passed, so many things happened in this long-but-feels-short period but whatever it is, alhamdulillah, Allah still gives me the chance to live. Looking back at how this rough life has hit most of us, my life ten years ago was certainly much better than today's.
"I can't wait to be a grown up. To live my own life, to drive my own car, to have my own family, to finally stop doing homework and start WORKING!"
Regrets, regrets. Not that much, just a bit. Really! Ok, I lied, a bit.
"Screw adulting. I wish I was forever a kid."
There are times when we feel like running as far as we can, if possible, till the end of the world, (if only it was flat, though) leaving every single thing behind and just mind about you and yourself. Money, commitments, people, you don't even want to give a glimpse on them. How you wish you could do that. How I wish I could do that.. But, we need to be realistic. No matter how bad we want to relive our childhood, it will never happen. No matter how we want to run away from our responsibilities, we know that we can't. Well, we can. But we all know that is not a right thing for us to even consider. And we know, we will never be content if we chose the wrong way to live our life.
Whoever chooses to follow the right path, follows it but for his own good; and whoever goes astray, goes but astray to his own loss; and no bearer of burdens shall be made to bear another’s burden (Al-Israa’ 17:15)
There is a saying that goes "Sometimes you need to be stupid to be able to know how great it feels like to be clever". Ever heard of that? If yes, that's weird. Because nobody actually said that. Hahahha.
Anyway.. I am now in a phase of life whereby I started to realize that I have done so many mistakes and damages, be it to myself or people around me. I realized how I have constantly taken things very lightly and been so confident with every decision that I have made, alone. I realized how I was never really serious about my life. I feel like I am such a disgrace and a failure to myself and my family. I have failed. But I know Allah won't leave me hopeless, and helpless. I know there is always something within me that can benefit others. I myself, judging through my life would recognize myself as a failure, but to those of you who might not know my stories, I really hope that the things I wrote here, inspired by my failures, would benefit you in any possible ways, inshaAllah. Ok! See you in the next post, inshaAllah.
Really hope this won't be hangat-hangat tahi ayam
:)
